I'd like some of that!

I went to see my Nana earlier this evening in the hospital.

She looked tired, and has a big bandage on her shoulder. 

The real fun began when she started to speak.  I came into the room, and said hello, and she said "mira ese perrito blanco que esta aqui en la cama." (look at the little white dog here on the bed) And when my Dad came in, she asked him not to take away her cocktail.

???Nana, there's no dog on the bed, it's your blanket.  Move the blanket, and started helping her sit up on the bed b/c she was leaning perilously close to the edge.  She says to me "hay muchas papitas aqui en este plato..." (there are a lot of french fries on this plate)  Nana, there are no fries here.  I stroked her head, and she felt feverish.  I took her ice bag, and told her I'd be right back, and went to fill it with the idea of catching her nurse and asking her some questions.  I didn't find her, but someone sent her back to the room for me...

"She feels feverish and is really disoriented," I say.  The nurse says "Well, she has had a low fever today, and it's not bad, but not good either.  We are watching it.  It is common for elderly people to become disoriented after they suffer a fracture.  We hope she'll snap out of it soon.  But I'm not aware of how sharp she was before the injury, so I'm basing her disorientation on the usual behavior we see with elderly patients."  I think, okay.  "So what's this I hear about her not cooperating when the physical therapists wanted her to walk?"  "Well, she took about four steps.  And she was leaning to her good side, in a manner that's not safe, so they sat her back down."  "She says she's uncomfortable," my Dad says.  And the nurse replies, with a straight face: "I gave her some Percocet earlier, and it didn't work for her, so then I gave her two Lortabs, and that seemed to do it."

???What?  You gave my Nana enough medicine to knock out a Marine, and you are wondering why she's asking inappropriate questions and doesn't know where she is and is disoriented?  She's hallucinating little white dogs, french fries, and our hometown, and no one thinks this could have been a side effect of all the narcotics?  WTF?  You know, I'd be hard pressed to take four steps had I'd ingested all those pharmaceuticals.  Some days, I have trouble walking and chewing gum at the same time, with no medication whatsoever.  Poor Nana!! :)

We left a little after that.  But before I did,  I fluffed her pillows, and tucked her in.  She asked about the little white dog again, and I realized she was referring to the box of tissues on her bed!  So I held them closer to her and said, "Mira, Nana, this is a box of Kleenex, not el perrito blanco."  And she smiled, a little embarrassed. 

I resisted the urge to turn on some Jimi Hendrix as I was turning out the lights to go.