The jaws of death

Mood: annoyed

I know people wax poetic about the joys of owning pets.  Usually, I can relate, I love my animals. 

Currently, we sport a dog and two cats.  The cats are indoor only, and old; the dog is still a pup, not quite a year old, she's lab mix we've had since August.   She's quite rambunctious, and likes the kids.  We did the whole obedience training thing with her because she was a little too nippy and I can't have that with all the little ones swirling around.  She's a smart dog, so she gets bored...which leads me to...she never met a piece of plastic she didn't like.  Or cardboard.  Or paper.  You get the picture.

She could chew her way out of almost anything.  There's a bothersome tree in my backyard -really, we didn't plant it- and she's managed to gnaw down some of the branches off that.  She's chewed her way through a few plastic food bowls, some legos, and board books; magazines, boxes and catalogs...   The light bulb went off in my head, and I got her stainless steel food bowls, (ha, chew through that, bitch) but everytime I turn around, something else is shredded.  It's like having an extra toddler around some days.  At least the Christmas tree is still intact (although she managed to get a couple of ornaments..)

So today, it's wet outside and pretty cold, so she's gonna be in with us all day.  Which really, is fine, but it's gonna be a long day of vigilance for me.  Couple the chew-watch with the fact that the cats hate her and hiss/swipe/hiss everytime she walks by and you have the makings of a fun afternoon.  

And yes, she has her own things to chew on.  They don't keep her busy for too long, but they buy me time.  

Did I mention she loves to eat the cat food but will leave hers alone?  (we hide it when she's in)

I, in frustration, at times threaten her with the no-kill shelter ("That's it!  Friends for Life, Shadow, Friends for Life!!") which starts off a chorus of "No, Mommy, NO!!"  And when she's really, really, bad I switch to "No Friends for Life for you, girl, you're going to the Humane Society, where your days are numbered!" which really sets off the chorus and tears too, so I don't do it often.  Nolan gets a chuckle out of it, and they all know that I'd never do it...but it's good to know I have options, lol. 

I'm kidding, I like her too much, she's my walking partner and companion who loves the car. 

Oh, look, she's chewing on a...what is that?  A Bionicle?  At least it was a Bionicle...or is that HEY!  how'd she get Audrey's lippy????

Guess this means she's gonna smell like strawberry shortcake at either end....eewww.  At the very least, it'll make cleaning up after her in the yard...interesting.