Thursday, February 22, 2007

Of all things to impress him, it's my dazzling... sounds?

One night last week, the kids were a little hyper, in that pre-bedtime hyperness that all little kids are prone too.

I set them loose on their father, as well, it was his turn.  And it's funny for me to see him buried under all his children.  That's what he gets for knocking me up in the first place; an avalanche of arms, legs, and wayward feet that remind him of the reason why cups were invented for contact sports.  Usually, "Ooof!" is all I hear coming from the bottom of the dog pile.

Ben, however, was just a little too much to bear. He was so over the top, I feared for everyone's safety.  I stood in the doorway, leaning against the jamb, and ordered him out.

As he went by me into the hallway, I happened to pass wind.  I'm human, it happens.

Of course, everyone in the room was already looking at me, because they thought I was going to put a hurt on Ben (of the tickling variety).

Instead, they were treated to something louder, and more potent.

I thought my husband was going to fall off the bed, he was laughing so hard.

"Oh, my god!  You didn't even flinch, you just let that one go,"  he said, amazed, impressed.  "That kid never stood a chance.  He never even suspected!!!"  Mr W exclaimed, as he doubled over.

Great.  Now everyone is in on it.

A chorus of voices:  "Mommy, can you teach me how to do that?"

That's the moment I've been waiting for all my life.  That special, bonding moment when I pass on one of the mysteries of life to my children, one they always remember nostalgically, Kleenex in hand.

Leave it to me, that it has less to do with the mysteries of their own hearts, and everything to do with gas.

I thought it was over, once the laughter died down, but Mr W keeps on chuckling about it. 

"There was no adjustment in your posture, no shifting of the hips, no appearance whatsoever you were about to let it go,"  he chortled just last night.  "I wish I'd have had a video camera to tape that,"  he goes on..."I'd send it into one of the funny video shows, and we'd so totally win,"  he adds.

Of all my moments of greatness, of all the times I have managed to love and not send the children packing, of all the other things I am so very talented at, THIS is the one thing he'd choose to immortalize?

Boy am I ever happy that I never remember to actually charge the batteries to the camcorder.

I'll just place this event in the file under "Things I Will Never Live Down."

It's time to get a new one anyway.


perkysgrl said...

No, you will never live that down :)

katie39041 said...

What can i say, that entry was too funny, lol
love and hugs

jckfrstross said...

LMAO too funny:)


jevanslink said...

You'll have plenty of other opportunities to immortalize yourself.  Again and again.

Mrs. L